What do I to do if a male client makes a pass at me?

Possibly the reason why so many female live-in carers refuse to work with a male client is that they are scared he may make a pass at them. It may also have happened that someone has made inappropriate suggestions to them. This may very well be a question to ask if you do choose to accept male clients.

In most cases your male client will behave as the perfect gentleman, but unfortunately there will be some who will behave in an inappropriate manner.

What do you do if this happens?

The important thing it to stop things right away, never let them get out of hand. Never accept sexual behaviour that offends you, you must nip it in the bud right away. If you don’t it will simply progress until it becomes unmanageable.

Speak to your client

If you feel that your male client has behaved in an inappropriate way, address it with him. If your client is of sound mental capacity, he may see reason and realise that he has overstepped the mark. Make your point known and move on.

Speak to your agency

Even if your client has apologised to you for his behaviour, you should still document the incident and report it to your agency right away. This will be valuable if it ever happens again. You will have something to back you up and support from your agency.

Speak to family

Often the family are not aware of any sexual indiscretions their parent makes because many people are embarrassed to talk to them about it. Letting them know about anything that has happened covers your back in case it happens again. While they may not do anything about it, you have made them aware of the problem.

Sometimes clients who have Dementia become aggressive and abusive. Occasionally they may show sexual behaviour traits which you may find unacceptable. It is important that the family or Power of Attorney are made aware of this.

Protect yourself

If your client attempts to abuse you, you are within your rights to call for help, and you should do so. In any situation where you fear for your own safety, you must get yourself to a safe place and call 999 for assistance. If your client suffers from Dementia, you should let them know that he is becoming aggressive towards you and you feel endangered.

As you go through your care career you will hear other carers talking about how they have ‘handled’ cases of sexual harassment. Not all of them will be the right way, and you should discard these suggestions.

You are not doing yourself any favours to let this sort of behaviour become acceptable, because one day it will get out of hand and you will be hurt. Remember that many male clients will be stronger than you and you may not be able to defend yourself.

If you are ever in the situation where you feel your client is going to hurt you, then call for help right away.

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