While we have all been trained to watch out for abuse in different ways, what we are very seldom told as live-in carers, is that there are times when we ourselves are abused.
Now, you may think that this is a shocking statement to make but consider some scenarios before deciding.
There are many different ways that a client can be abused, and this can take place by any person who works with our clients. Even family, unfortunately, can play a part in abuse, whether they realize it or not.
While most live-in carers know of instances where they have felt their clients are being abused, it is very rare to hear about a carer who feels she herself is being abused.
Sometimes nastiness and cruel words come from our clients, particularly when they suffer from Dementia, and this treatment we often simply accept as part of the condition.
But what happens when we feel abused by our agencies? Can they even abuse us, and if so, what can be done about it?
So, how can we be abused?
While we would probably never be abused physically by an agency or any staff member, there are other ways to abuse a person.
Mental abuse
If you have ever been placed with a ‘nightmare client’ (and we do get them) then you may have asked your agency to remove you from the placement.
While some agencies will strive to do this as soon as they can, there are unfortunately some who will ignore your issue and simply hope that you will ‘sort things out’, given time.
Changing carers just because you are not happy there is extra work for an agency and often the suggestion is that the other carers have managed, so why can’t you?
Mentally, this does us no good at all, knowing that our agency, who should be supporting us, feels we are inadequate. Not only that, they are reluctant to remove us from an unhappy placement, which makes us feel even more neglected.
Psychological abuse
It is a well-known fact that agencies like their staff to work for them alone, even though they will tell us that they have no objections to carers working with more than one agency.
If you have worked for more than one agency, and one of them realizes this, you may find yourself short of work with that agency.
You may also find that you are only offered placements at a minimum wage, even though the workload may merit a higher pay scale.
It may seem that you are being punished for seeking employment with more than one agency. They are displeased with you and thus offer you lower end placements and fewer than you used to get.
What can we do?
The first and most important thing between carer and agency is communication. You need to state your case clearly, in writing. You may even offer a solution such as removal from a placement.
If you feel you are being discriminated against for working with two agencies, you must discuss this with the agency that is upsetting you.
Holding feelings of worthlessness and inadequacy, as well as feeling frustrated because you are offered less work, will simply leave you angry.
The outcome?
This depends on the agency and their approach to their carers. Some will see your point and help to change your situation, while unfortunately others will ignore you issue in the hope that they will go away.
In a perfect world every agency has the best intentions for its carers and does their best to support them. In the real world, unfortunately, there are times when it seems that carers are on the receiving end of unpleasantness from their own agencies.
To sum up
Talking should be your first plan and normally this will help to clear the air and resolve the issue. If it does not, and you simply cannot meet in the middle, you may find it better for your own sanity, if you look for another agency, where you are treated with more respect.
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