Every person, whether they need a live-in carer or not, has the right to live in safety and without fear of being abused.
While we may think that abuse only happens outside in dark places, it can most definitely happen in many other places, even right in the placement you are working at. In fact, abuse can take place anywhere. Schools, colleges, day care centres and even hospitals can be breeding grounds for abuse.
An abuser may be a stranger although often the person who causes the harm knows that the people they harm will trust them. Normally an abuser is in a position of trust and power.
In an ideal world your client will never be abused. Unfortunately, this is not always the case and you may find yourself wondering about odd or peculiar things that happen to and around your client.
There are several recognised forms of abuse.
There are several signs that will indicate that things are simply not right with your client and may indicate that somehow, they are being abused. Often a person will make excuses about why they do not want to go out, or why they have bruises and are short of money.
It is important to know the signs of abuse:
So, what if I suspect someone is abusing my client?
It is important that you keep calm and stay calm. Talk to your client (if they can communicate with you) and explain that you have noticed some strange things and are concerned.
Allow them to talk as much as they want to. Remember that anyone who is being abused may be scared to talk for fear of repercussions. They may be worried about making the situation worse. Many older people simply do not want to cause trouble.
Never make a promise not to tell their secret because if you need to report abuse, they will feel you have lied to them. Even if you are upset at what you hear you should try to stay calm yourself. If your client sees you upset, they may stop talking so as not to upset you any further.
Unless you feel that your client is in imminent danger you may give them time to think about your conversation and what they would like to do about it. If they have been abused, you should ask what they want to do. Your client should know that you can seek help on their behalf.
You should listen to what your client has to say before deciding any action on their behalf. If you work with an agency you should make a written report about all that you have been told, including dates and times. Your agency will then tell you where to go and who to contact, or they may do this on your behalf.
If you are a private live-in carer you should speak to the client’s doctor and social worker. Every council has social workers who deal with abuse and they will give you the contact information for the adult safeguarding co-ordinator.
Because some forms of abuse are also classed as criminal, you may also choose to speak to the local police. Of course, if either you or your client (or both of you) are in any physical danger from an abuser you should call the police at once. Never approach the abuser and never take up the issue with them.
There is a free and confidential helpline if you want to talk to someone about your situation. You can call Action on Elder Abuse on 0808 808 8144.
To sum up
Sometimes you may see signs of abuse and sometimes not. You may have nothing more to go on than your own gut feeling. Whatever you feel, if you are convinced that your client is being abused, you need to do something. Talk to your client. Talk to your agency and share your concerns. Talk to the doctor or social worker. What you should not do is keep your concerns to yourself.
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